As I went back and read through all my tumblr posts (procrastipasting), I thought to myself, wow I sure do whine a lot, mostly about small little things which in the grand scheme of life make up nothing. The other night when I went to bed and was left to nothing but my thoughts, I, as per usual, thought about stupid grudges about people or things in my life that I wish I had and the many questions about myself I wish I could answer. And then I thought about something else and as cliche as this sounds I’m going to write it anyways, I thought about the good things I have and the things to come. I smiled to myself. I thought about the fact I have these friends who every year since we left school, go to this beach house and have a week of just, fun. The fact that we might not have seen each other for 6 months is completely irrelevant because as soon as we are together again I feel like no time has past and we are all celebrating finishing school again. Sure there are plenty of things that have changed but I am learning to not hold grudges and to accept change as if its a gift. Because in the end you only have the choice of accepting it or whining about the inevitable. And then I thought about something else. I thought about how my work went to the effort of throwing me this amazing fondue party for my birthday with cake and everything. I thought about my holiday with my sister. I thought about how thinking about these things is far more rewarding.
So this tumblr, is my enlightening post. Just a reminder that at one point in time, I found this piece of joy that hopefully proves to continue. So I don’t have everything I want? So I think my life is taking 20 wrong directions at a time? I find I’m just too concerned. Too worried about what ‘might’ happen. What will happen will happen. I don’t want to be so worried. I don’t want to hold on to the little grudges because it’s not worth it. I’ve always told myself, if you don’t like something, change it. This is my slight change towards being better.
